Let’s talk about MASTERY. I use the word quite often. Mastery is an obsession for me. My upcoming Masterclass is called, How to Become a World Class Transformational Coach, which means, “How to be a Master at what you do.” What does Mastery mean in......
Dear Important and Precious Woman: On behalf of myself, and on behalf of many of my brothers, I want to apologize to you. This apology is for you, specifically, and secondarily for all women. I wish I could speak on behalf of all men,......
This is one of my favorite essays ever published. It originally appeared in Esquire Magazine, in their October 1993 issue. Mental bungee-jumping may not be your sport of choice, but there’s a cerebral ledge that sooner or later each of us has to leap......
[Originally published as a Choice Magazine Expert Series] In this 4-part series, we examine BELIEFS – what they are, how they function, and how they impact your client’s behavior (and your own, as well). Part 1: What To Do When Your Client’s Behavior Confuses......
[First published in Choice Magazine for Coaches] Most of us recognize the negative power that limiting beliefs play in our lives, and in our clients’ lives. But what is the source of beliefs? How did those beliefs form in the first place? And why? And......
[First published in Choice, The Magazine of Professional Coaching, Volume 19, Number 1, 2021] It has finally dawned on Western society that underneath most our deep problems, issues, and discomforts are wounds and traumas from the past. These Adverse Childhood Experiences have been well......
Published in Coaching World, the magazine of the International Coach Federation . Your client offers another excuse as to why they didn’t do what they committed to in your last session. You’ve seen this pattern lead to failure, and know you need to focus on......
Do you ever judge other people? Do you judge yourself? It’s a very human thing to do. We know what it feels like to be judged by another person. It feels crappy. So why do we do it to others? There’s a good reason, but......
Brene’ Brown, PhD (author of The Gifts of Imperfection) has spoken articulately about shame, and I can feel the force of that emotion inside of me. I am able to facilitate deep transformation in others only because I have looked deeply into myself, into the core......
Beliefs are useful. They eliminate the discomfort of the unknown. A rule of the mind states: “Familiar is safe and comfortable. Unfamiliar is dangerous and uncomfortable.” Our biological and anthropological history installed anxiety as a survival mechanism. This deep program was useful when the world was......
During a presentation to the Los Angeles Chapter of the International Coach Federation, a coach asked me whether transformation could be as quick and efficient as I had claimed in my talk. “I’ve tried other techniques,” she said, “but the only thing that’s worked is......
“Whatever the mind of man can conceive and believe, it can achieve.” Napoleon Hill (1883-1970) wrote this famous line in his classic 1937 book, Think and Grow Rich. Hill drew on stories of Andrew Carnegie, Thomas Edison, Henry Ford, and other millionaires of his generation......
For decades, I wanted more. More stuff. More money. More clients. More friends. More love. More attention. This egotistical desire served me well. I got a lot of everything, and in many cases, more than I could handle! The hunger for “more” seems to be......
Looking out over an ocean of colorful faces and blue uniforms, I see a room-full of prisoners inside San Quentin Prison. All shades of flesh color the room, from dark blue-black to the brightest lily white, and every shade of brown, beige and tan. Their......
After studying more than twenty different belief-change methodologies, I was able to identify seven crucial elements of the belief change process. I tested these methodologies personally, and also with my clients. If all seven are present, a belief can be completely eliminated from the core......
by Lion Goodman and John Jones For men, it is vital to understand the issue of control if we wish to improve ourselves – and the world – in any way. Control is pervasive, and it has permeated masculine humanity throughout the ages, at all......
During the past five decades, since the earliest years of the Feminist movement, there has been an increasing awareness and interest in the Divine Feminine. Hundreds of websites focus on exploring all aspects of the feminine, including the Goddess and how she appears in all......
(Humor) Endarkenment: The Top 40 Ways to Make Yourself Miserable (Along with Everyone Else Around You) I have spent most of my life making myself unhappy, and I learned long ago how to share my misery with others. In writing this article, I didn’t want......
I’m sometimes asked, “Why not just eliminate all your beliefs? Isn’t that the point of enlightenment?” It is possible to eliminate all of your beliefs with the Clear Beliefs Process. It would take some time – because you’ve accumulated tens of thousands of beliefs in your lifetime. Consider language.......
The Red Queen proclaimed that she sometimes believed six impossible things before breakfast. In Tim Burton’s fantastic film, Alice in Wonderland, Alice is portrayed as an ingénue who is caught between two worlds: the staid expectations and beliefs of her Victorian era social structure (as......
Have you ever set out to accomplish a particular task, and found yourself distracted or sidetracked, having forgotten your original intention? For some people it happens many times each day. Is this just a memory problem, or is something deeper going on? How many projects......
Consciousness is like an iceberg – 90% of it is underwater, invisible to our awareness. Most of our behavior patterns, and the causes of those behaviors, are automatic. The reasons for their occurrence are below our conscious awareness (in the sub-conscious). Awakening is the process......
“Imagination is more important than knowledge.” ~ Albert Einstein The Imaginal Realm appears to be infinite – or at least as large as the Universe. (I secretly believe that the Universe is expanding because we (and others) keep imagining new things.) The term “Imaginal Realm” was......
Dorothy feels afraid and powerless, and she doesn’t like it. Mean old Elmira Gulch is threatening to take away her dog, Toto, Dorothy’s closest friend and companion. Aunt Em and Uncle Henry are too busy counting chicks to be bothered. Zeke insists she be courageous, even......
The quest for happiness is as old as humankind. Where does happiness come from? Consider this scenario: You’re walking down the street, and you notice a sandwich shop. You walk in, and order a meal. How did you decide what to order? Your actions and......
My friend Michael, an expert rock climber, told me he wanted to do something special for my 50th birthday – take me up a famous rock climbing wall, Cathedral Peak, in Yosemite Valley. “Sure!” I replied. I some rock climbing experience in college, and 4......
During the summer of 1978, I was working as a traveling salesman. I drove through cities and towns in the southwestern states, selling jewelry and giftware to stores along the way. I had just completed a productive week in Las Vegas, where I made many sales.......
Narcissism = Selfishness = Egotism: Are you more focused on yourself than on your partner? [Note: In this article, I speak as a masculine man in relationship to feminine women. Please adjust the gender terms to suit your relationship life.] In previous articles, I described......
by Lion Goodman, PCC and Carista Luminare, PhD When it comes to love, everyone wants one thing: MORE! We all need love. And it’s rare to hear a complaint about having too much of it (unless it’s alloyed with something OTHER than love). If you......
Most of us are somewhat confused about love. We yearn for love, and we need love. But what does healthy love look like? And how can we create it? Our confusion leads to all sorts of unconscious and irrational behavior, uncomfortable feelings, and reactivity in......