What Is Happiness? And How Can I Get Some?

The quest for happiness is as old as humankind.
Where does happiness come from?

Consider this scenario: You’re walking down the street, and you notice a sandwich shop. You walk in, and order a meal. How did you decide what to order?

Your actions and choice began with an uncomfortable sensation (hunger), and imagining a desired state (feeling full and satisfied).

You utilized your memory system, a series of experiences from the past in which you ate a lot of different sandwiches, and then discovered your favorite from among them.

You projected some of those experiences into the future, which created an expectation of enjoying it again. Your decision-action circuits engaged your body in specific actions (walking into the shop, looking at the menu, etc.), and the result was ordering the sandwich you imagined eating.

You took actions to eliminate the discomfort of hunger and replace it with the comfort of satiation. And now lunch is over.

95% or more of this entire scenario was driven by your subconscious mind, and less than 5% of your conscious mind was involved. If you checked your messages and emails while you ate, you may not remember eating it, or what the sandwich tasted like. You were running on automatic pilot.

What does this have to do with HAPPINESS? Happiness occurs when you are experiencing your experience fully, without resistance, and your ATTENTION is focused here, in this moment of NOW.

You have memories of being happy. And you probably seek out the same kinds of activities and actions that were associated with happiness in the past. If you experienced happiness while riding a bicycle, you’ll probably go riding again and again. If you were happy on a date, you will most likely go out with that person again. We fill our lives with actions that “should” make us happy, based on the “it felt good the last time” principle. Unfortunately, this rarely works to make us happy, because happiness is not like hunger. It can’t be satisfied with something outside of ourselves – because happiness is not based on a physical need. Rather, happiness is a phenomenon of the mind, or the inner self. Happiness is self-generated.

Most people look for happiness outside themselves, and for good reasons. We are bombarded with thousands of advertising messages every day, telling us that if we use this make-up, buy this car, smoke those cigarettes, wear this brand of clothes, or eat at that fast food restaurant, we will satisfy our desires for happiness. We will suddenly have satisfying relationships, joy and laughter, sex appeal, and satisfaction.

It’s not just advertising that convinces us that we should seek our happiness outside ourselves. We believe our parents: “If you become a doctor/lawyer/engineer you’ll live a good life.” We believe our religious leaders: “If you believe what we believe, you’ll be saved/enlightened/joyous.” We believe our friends: “If you _______ (fill in the blank), you will be happier.”

Where does happiness really come from? We know that it doesn’t come consistently from anything outside ourselves, although we spend tremendous amounts of time and money trying to achieve that tenuous state. It must, therefore come from within ourselves. Is it possible to generate happiness anytime you want?

Try this experiment: Smile until you feel happy. It may take only a moment, or it might take a few minutes. Try it right now.

Now take a minute and try another experiment: Think to yourself, “I’m happy” until you smile.

Did you notice that there was nothing outside of yourself that was required for you to experience happiness? And if that is the case, why aren’t you happy more often?

The source of our unhappiness is also within us. There are four main causes of unhappiness:

  1. Our attachment to what is, or what we have, and our concomitant fear of loss. For example, such as staying in a relationship that isn’t working.
  2. Our desire for what isn’t so, or what we don’t have. For example, wanting the body of a supermodel.
  3. Resistance to that which we are experiencing in this moment – such as fear, anger, loneliness or sadness.
  4. Our limiting and negative beliefs about ourselves, about others, and about the world around us. For example,“I don’t have have what it takes.’ or “Everyone else is better off than I am.”

What does it take to be happy? It takes an honest, vulnerable, and open-minded assessment of what stands in the way between you and being happy. It takes time, attention, and practice. It takes tools that work. It takes a careful examination of your belief system. It is our beliefs that cause us to create or attract the situations and events that we experiences as our lives. Most of these core beliefs are transparent to us. They are constantly operating, but are below the level of our conscious mind. What does it take to uncover them and change them?

During my 40 years of self-exploration, I discovered numerous valuable techniques and teachings, philosophies and exercises. They each moved me forward toward my goal of being happy, and I came out of each one with a “workshop high.” But I had to take another workshop to get that feeling again. This was my form of “sandwich” – my attempt to gain happiness from an outside source. Then, through luck or fate, I discovered a set of tools that I could use to generate my own happiness. During a personal growth workshop, I found that I had a transparent core belief deep down beneath my unhappiness: “I’m not a happy person.” Using the tools I had learned, I “discreated,” or disappeared, that belief. What emerged was a natural state of happiness that flowed easily out of me and into my daily life.

Now, with the Clear Beliefs Method, I can create any state of consciousness I wish. I can change my mood at will. When I find myself reacting, I can quickly find the source of the reaction, and clear it up. I no longer have to wait for the next workshop, because I am the leader of the workshop called “my life.”

People around the world are discovering that they can remove what is no longer wanted or needed from their consciousness.  This allows their True Self, Higher Self, or Spiritual self to emerge easily and effortlessly.  Each person who learns the technique can use it to create the life they want. Some use it for economic and material success, some use it for spiritual advancement. Others use it to explore extraordinary beliefs and dimensions.

People who learn to change their beliefs become happier, more peaceful, and more capable of managing their lives. Graduates of the program become more pragmatic, more compassionate, and more in tune with their higher selves. What would you like to change about your life? I suggest that you try happiness – you’ll enjoy it!

Check out our belief-clearing coaching program: www.ClearYourBeliefs.com

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Lion Goodman
liongoodman@gmail.com
5 Comments
  • Alison
    Posted at 09:19h, 19 February Reply

    so true… so very true 🙂

  • Tim Corcoran
    Posted at 09:19h, 03 December Reply

    Beautiful article Lion, thank you for sharing this! I love the line:

    I no longer have to wait for the next workshop, because I am the leader of the workshop called “my life.”

    I laughed and experienced happiness when reading that one! As always, your work is inspiring!

  • J Adam milgram
    Posted at 09:47h, 03 December Reply

    We have so much in common my dear Brother. I have been ruminating/meditating about happiness for some time now and will be giving a lecture entitled “The Alchemy of Happiness” at the Sausalito Library on January 17th at 7:00 P.M.

    For sure, a lasting happiness cannot be found external to one’s being, but only within one so to speak. Love, gratitude, harmonious thoughts surely help. but finding the source of happiness in oneself is the goal.

    Love and blessings,

    adam

  • Ruth Duffield
    Posted at 08:41h, 11 August Reply

    You write so eloquently Lion. I loved reading this article.

    Love.

    Ruth

    xxxx

  • J Adam milgram
    Posted at 09:23h, 28 December Reply

    You are correct in stating that happiness comes from within. In fact, I believe that happiness is our natural state of being. What obscures this natural state is an un-pure mind, a mind filled with thoughts of darkness. Hatred, envy, pessimism, greed, animosity, prejudice, criticisms, complaint’s – you name it. Purifying the mind and heart leads to a natural state of joy and happiness.

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